


The Blood-Dimmed Tide

by McKay



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-03
Updated: 2017-05-03
Packaged: 2018-10-27 18:24:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,002
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10814319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/McKay/pseuds/McKay
Summary: An exploration of how events might have unfolded if Remus had been Sorted into Slytherin, told in a series of vignettes.





	The Blood-Dimmed Tide

**Author's Note:**

> The character death(s) are not Snape or Lupin. 
> 
> Originally written for Snupin Santa 2007.

**1971**

After pushing awkwardly through the corridors and peering through doorways only to meet unwelcoming stares, Remus finally found a compartment that wasn't full near the back of the train; the only occupant was a scrawny, black-haired boy who had his nose buried in a book, and Remus breathed a sigh of relief.

"Mind if I join you?" he asked hesitantly.

The boy gave a terse nod, and Remus perched on the seat opposite him. The boy looked to be a fellow First Year, but he was reading an advanced text on the Dark Arts.

"Your parents let you read things like that?" Remus asked, startled.

The boy glared at him over the top of the book. "My mum says it's more difficult to resist a temptation when you don't understand what it really is."

"That makes sense," Remus said, nodding. "My name's Remus."

"Severus." The reply was muffled behind the book.

"I guess you're from a Wizarding family, then?" Remus wasn't socially inept; he realized Severus would rather read than talk, but he was nervous about going to Hogwarts, and he hoped drawing out his companion would help pass the time until they got there.

With an aggrieved sigh, Severus closed the book. "My dad's a Muggle."

"So's my Mum."

"We're practically soul-mates," Severus drawled sarcastically.

Remus laughed. "Maybe so."

* * *

They were joined by a red-haired girl who seemed to know Severus already, treating him with a degree of familiarity that Remus envied. After hearing his father's warnings about how the Wizarding world viewed werewolves, he was afraid he wouldn't be able to make friends and still keep his secret.

But Lily was too vivacious for him to dislike, and the three of them chatted amiably. Once they managed to get Severus to talk, he proved to be an oddly enjoyable companion; he knew more about magic in general and Hogwarts in particular than Remus did, and Remus listened, eager to learn as much as he could about the school.

Their idyll was interrupted, however, when the compartment door was flung open, and a boy with unruly black hair stuck his head in and glanced around.

"Oi, Sirius! There's room in here," he called over his shoulder.

Without waiting for a response, the boy swaggered in, and he dropped heavily on the seat beside Remus, who edged closer to the window. There was something about the boy that overflowed his slight frame, making him seem bigger than he was.

"I'm James Potter," he said as if to the compartment at large, but he was looking at Lily.

* * *

"I'm probably going to end up in Slytherin," Sirius said morosely as he stared out the window into the gathering twilight.

"What's wrong with that?" Severus asked, his tone sharp.

Across from Sirius, Remus shrank closer to the window. The tension had escalated steadily; he suspected James didn't like Lily's familiarity with Severus because he wanted her attention to be on him. He kept trying to make Severus look bad, as if pointing out Severus' flaws would make Lily lose interest in him. But it only made Lily more unimpressed and Severus more testy. Remus wanted to tell James to shut up, but he didn't dare, and so he stared out the window and wished James hadn't come along.

"My family expect me to be in Slytherin," Sirius said. His animated voice turned flat and cold. "But I don't give a gnome's arse about doing what they expect."

"I'll be in Gryffindor," James announced, and Severus rolled his eyes.

"I don't care what House I'm in," Lily said with a haughty sniff. "I just want to learn about magic."

"Probably Ravenclaw, then," Sirius said. He turned to Remus. "What about you?"

Remus smiled wanly. "I don't know where I belong."

* * *

When Professor McGonagall called his name, Remus slunk over to where the stool with the Sorting Hat on it awaited him. He could feel the weight of hundreds of gazes on him, and his face burned; he hated being the focus of attention, and he wished the Sorting Ceremony could have been private.

Professor McGonagall picked up the hat and plunked it on his head once he was perched on the stool, and he squeezed his eyes shut, waiting for whatever was to happen next.

_Curious to learn, I see._

Remus gasped, his eyes flying open wide at the sound of a voice in his head.

_You're intelligent enough. You'd do well in Ravenclaw, but there's a Darkness about you, too._

_I'm not evil_ , he thought, squeezing his eyes shut again.

_Being touched by Darkness doesn't make you evil, boy. Your own choices will determine that. But with your furry little problem, you'll be best served by learning control and secrecy, and there's one House that can teach you that better than the rest._

"SLYTHERIN!"

As he made his way to the Slytherin table, he glanced at the remaining First Years in line, and he thought he saw Severus smile.

* * *

Remus hummed happily as he finished packing, eager to return home for the Christmas holidays. Across the room, Severus lay on his bed, reading.

"Are you already packed?" Remus asked.

"I'm not going home," Severus replied tersely.

"Oh, your parents are going away?"

"No, I just don't want to go home." Severus closed his book and sat up, his face etched with tension. "If I could live here year-round and never go home again, I would."

Remus bit his lip, wanting to ask more, but he knew Severus well enough to know if Severus didn't want to talk about something, he wouldn't, and any attempts to pry it out of him would result in a row.

"I can't say that. I miss my family," he said at last.

"I know. I heard you crying the first couple of weeks."

Remus shrugged and smiled bashfully. "Anyway," he said, drawing his wand and levitating a box wrapped in gold paper over to Severus, "I suppose I ought to give you this now." 

Severus plucked it out of the air and gazed at it, seeming amazed by such a simple thing as a gift, which made Remus' heart twist in his chest.

"Merry Christmas," Remus said softly.

"Thanks." Severus hesitated. "Merry Christmas to you, too."

* * *

**1972:**

It was disconcerting to have Regulus Black following them – well, following Severus, really – around all the time. He wasn't an annoying boy, but Remus found himself irked by the way he gazed at Severus with calf-eyed adoration and soaked up every word that fell from Severus' lips like an eager sponge.

"I can't decide whether you're doing it to irritate Sirius or because you like all the fawning attention," Remus remarked as they sat beneath a tree doing homework.

Severus glanced up from the star chart he was creating. "Doing what?"

"Taking Regulus under your wing."

"Jealous, are you?" Severus smirked, and Remus swung at him playfully.

With Lily in Gryffindor, her contact with Severus was limited, and their relationship had grown more distant as she made friends in her own House and spent time with them outside of classes, allowing Remus to get closer to Severus instead, but Remus wasn't jealous of Regulus getting close to him, too.

Well, not much.

"Prat. I just think it's funny, that's all."

"Hmph." Severus turned his attention back to the chart, and he threw down his quill in disgust. "I can't figure out where Uranus goes."

Remus snickered, and Severus glared at him.

"Divination is stupid," Severus muttered. "A bunch of woolly nonsense."

"You don't believe in Fate?"

"I believe in myself."

* * *

Remus' muscles were sore, his joints were stiff, and he knew without looking that there were bites and scratches on his arms and legs; he could feel the sting of fresh wounds, but he knew Madam Pomfrey would be along soon to treat them. She would take the pain away, and then he could rest.

A rustle of movement made him open his eyes, and he gasped in alarm when he saw Severus standing beside his bed. Severus' expression was blank, and Remus quailed, terrified that Severus was going to reject him and tell the whole school he was a monster.

"You could've told me," Severus said at last, his tone reproachful.

Remus boggled at him.

"You know I've read about werewolves. I know you aren't dangerous except in wolf form. I'm not stupid." There was a trace of defensiveness in his voice.

"I – I was afraid you wouldn't like me anymore," Remus said, wringing the sheet between his fingers. "I'm a monster."

"Don't be stupid," Severus said derisively, and the normalcy of that tone made Remus relax.

"Has anyone else figured it out?"

"No, just me."

"Good. I trust you."

Severus smiled. "You're safe with me."

"I know."

* * *

**1973:**

"There's a storm brewing outside these walls," Wilkes said, pacing in front of the hearth in the Common Room. "And we're stuck here!"

"I heard my parents talking about that fellow," Evan said from where he sat sideways in an overstuffed chair, swinging one foot.

"My parents support him," Regulus sounded unusually subdued and hesitant.

Wilkes nodded fervently, but Evan rolled his eyes.

"It's rubbish!" Evan pointed at Severus. "Any pure-bloods want to duel Severus?" There were no takers, and Evan nodded, seeming satisfied his point had been made. "Fair or unfair fight, he'd best the lot of us for all that he's a half-blood. Same with the little mouse," he added, gesturing to Remus. "He's the best in his year at Transfiguration."

"Blood is only part of it," Wilkes retorted. "We're being held back! It's only a certain kind of people getting ahead these days. Even our own headmaster favors Gryffindors, who are—"

"Consistently overrun by Weasleys," Evan drawled. "The most fecund pure-blood family in existence. There's also Potter and Sirius Black, both pure as pure can be. But the favoritism… I'll give you that."

Remus sat at Severus' feet and listened with growing concern, wondering if political and social discontent would be enough to overcome people's reservations about the dark wizard's plans for cleansing the Wizarding world.

* * *

**1974:**

"Thanks for coming home with me," Remus said, glancing over at Severus with ill-concealed delight.

Severus shrugged and continued unpacking. "Regulus invited me too, you know." He smirked sidelong at Remus, who scowled. He stroked the frown line between Remus' eyebrows with his forefinger. "Even if I didn't dislike his brother, I'd rather spend the holidays with you."

Remus relaxed and smiled, inexplicably warmed; Severus rarely touched anyone voluntarily. "Good."

"Besides, I have a present for you," Severus added, his tone casual, and Remus perked up. Severus had never given him a Christmas or birthday gift before; he knew it was because Severus couldn't afford to buy gifts, and he didn't mind.

"What is it?"

"It's not Christmas yet!" Severus protested, but Remus gave him a pleading look, and Severus rolled his eyes and relented. "Oh, all right. Close your eyes and count to five. Then open your eyes again."

Remus did as he was instructed, but when he opened his eyes, Severus was gone. He thought it was a trick and Severus had left the room to tease him until he felt something butting against his ankle; he looked down to see a black badger at his feet.

"Severus! You're an Animagus!"

Remus had barely got over the shock when Severus shifted back in a smooth motion – before Remus could bend down and see if his fur really was as soft as it looked, unfortunately.

"Werewolves don't attack animals, only humans," Severus said, his expression uncertain. "Regulus learned, too, only he turns into a hare. He wasn't best pleased by that." He hesitated, a faint blush rising in his cheeks. "I thought… maybe it's stupid… but we could keep you company."

Too choked up to speak, Remus flung his arms around Severus instead, and to his surprise, Severus didn't protest.

* * *

**1975:**

Remus stood in the doorway of their dorm room while Regulus hovered anxiously behind him as Severus raged around the room, shouting and throwing things.

"I'm sorry," he said when it seemed the storm had passed enough for Severus to listen to him. "I tried—"

"Not hard enough!" Severus whirled on him furiously. "They ambushed me and strung me up for the whole damned school to laugh at!"

"There were three of them, and I'm not as good in a duel as you are," Remus snapped back, his own nerves frayed by the encounter. "Who are you really angry with, Severus? Me or Lily?"

Severus seemed to deflate at that, his shoulders drooping. "I thought being in different Houses wouldn't change anything between us," he said quietly. "I thought we'd always be friends. But she thought it was funny. I could tell."

"She did try to call James off," Remus pointed out. "But what you said to her…"

"I know!" Severus snapped, his anger appearing to rise once more. "I didn't mean it!" 

"But you still said it." Remus moved into the room, approaching slowly and with caution, but Severus didn't move away. "You hurt her too."

"I know. I wanted to."

* * *

Remus knew Severus wasn't a handsome boy. He was skinny and gawky, and his nose was too big for his thin face. His hair turned lank and oily no matter how often he washed it, and his shapeless second-hand clothes did nothing to help his appearance.

But there were times, like now, when Remus found him striking and couldn't help but stare. Bathed in the golden glow of firelight, Severus showed signs of the man he would become, tall and stern and still not handsome, but possessed of an appeal all his own.

It didn't help Remus' fluttering heart that Severus' voice had finally settled into an adult register; his voice had cracked all last year, but now it was deep and smooth, and hearing it made Remus' toes curl.

"Severus?"

"What?" Severus glanced up from his book, and Remus lunged, scarcely aware of having made the decision to act.

He pressed his lips against Severus' in a swift, hard kiss, and when he pulled back, he could scarcely breathe. He was not prone to bravery, and if Severus laughed or pushed him away, he would have to throw himself off the Astronomy Tower. 

But Severus smiled. "It's about bloody time."

* * *

**1976:**

Their time together was fleeting and precious at school, but they took advantage of stolen moments when they could, mostly in the library where the tall stacks offered shadowy hiding places.

Sometimes it was Severus who grabbed Remus' tie and hauled him aside for a heated snog, but mostly it was Remus who coaxed Severus into taking a break from the seemingly endless piles of homework they were assigned – like now.

The stone walls were cold against his back, but Remus didn't care; he had Severus in his arms to keep him warm, and Severus' bold kisses caused a heated flush to suffuse his entire body.

He had two secrets to hide now, and either would turn him into an outcast. Being bent was not quite as bad as being a werewolf, but it wasn't safe to admit either, not in the current climate where being different made someone a target. He longed to be normal, but he wasn't, and he never would be; when he was in Severus' arms, he found it easier to bear. After all, this was Severus' secret too.

Caught up in each other, neither heard the sounds of a sharp gasp and retreating footsteps.

* * *

"Regulus came to me and said he wanted to show me something," Sirius said, his voice laced with bitterness as he stared with utter loathing at his brother, who was huddled in a chair, his shoulders hunched and his face as pale as milk, although Remus could see venom in his eyes when he looked at Sirius in return. "He said it was an important secret. He showed me how to get past the Whomping Willow. I guess I should have suspected something was wrong when he didn't go with me."

Remus rested his chin on his fist, too weary in both body and spirit to hold his head up, and listened, his stomach sinking with every word. If he was lucky, he would be expelled, but he knew if the incident became public knowledge, it could mean his death as well.

"I heard growling, and then next thing I knew, Snape shoved me out of the way, turned into a badger, and attacked the werewolf. He held it off so I could get away," Sirius continued.

Professor Dumbledore nodded somberly. "I realize you have suffered a terrible ordeal. Rest assured, I will make certain there are suitable consequences."

"You're going to expel Regulus?" Sirius asked, savagely gleeful.

"No. No one will be expelled." Dumbledore held up his hand to forestall any argument. "The world is far too dangerous a place at the present time for anyone to leave this school with an incomplete education. Regulus will be punished, but not expelled."

"That's not fair! He almost killed me!" Sirius pointed at Remus, who shrank away from that accusatory finger.

"I didn't know," Remus murmured.

"But you knew, didn't you, Snape?" Sirius whirled on Severus. "You and my brother have always been tight. You were in on it!"

"I didn't know until just before I saved your life," Severus retorted hotly. "Regulus let it slip, and I tried to catch you before you got near the Shrieking Shack."

"I owe you a life-debt," Sirius spat.

"Yes, you do."

Neither of them looked terribly pleased by the fact.

* * *

The sound of raised voices captured Remus' attention, and he stole closer, trying to remain unseen and unheard. In a deserted classroom, Severus and Sirius were arguing, and Remus drew his wand just in case the altercation escalated into something more than verbal sparring.

"I don't care about protecting Regulus," Severus was saying. "After what he did, he's on his own as far as I'm concerned. I want your word you won't tell anyone what you know about Remus, not even Potter."

"I told Dumbledore I'd keep quiet," Sirius replied sullenly, his arms folded across his chest. "You don't trust me?"

"I want to make certain you have enough incentive to keep your word. Anything you want, Black. Your life-debt for his life. Just name the price."

Remus watched the two stare at each other, and it was Sirius who broke the silence first.

"Teach me how to become an Animagus," Sirius said at last. "And if I succeed in learning, you can't tell anyone what I can do. Not now, not ever. You keep your silence, and I'll keep mine."

Severus held out one hand. "Agreed."

They shook hands, and Remus retreated, hoping Severus hadn't made a rash bargain.

* * *

**1977:**

"I assume you have noticed I did not require you to register as an Animagus with the Ministry," Dumbledore said, peering over his half-moon glasses at Severus, who met his gaze evenly.

"I noticed," Severus replied, not without a touch of wariness.

"I believe it could be an advantage," Dumbledore continued. "As will be a skill I wish to teach to both of you, should you agree to my proposition. Attempts to curtail Tom Riddle's guerrilla tactics have proven useless."

"Tom Riddle?" Remus spoke up, confused.

"The dark wizard now calling himself Lord Voldemort," Dumbledore explained kindly. "We need to fight fire with fire. I understand he has been recruiting heavily among the Slytherins—"

"Not with complete success," Severus snapped, bristling in defense of his House.

"Thankfully, no. However, it puts you two in a strong position." The twinkle in Dumbledore's eyes faded, and Remus could suddenly see the weight bearing down on the venerable wizard's shoulders. "I need information."

"You need spies," Severus said.

"Yes." Dumbledore nodded. "I can teach you Occlumency. Severus, you would infiltrate the Death Eaters, and Remus, you would infiltrate the werewolves. You would both report whatever you learn directly to me. Will you do it?"

"Yes," Severus replied, drawing himself up proudly.

Remus hesitated, and then he too nodded. "Yes."

* * *

**1979:**

"This isn't what I wanted," Evan moaned, wavering on his feet; he looked pale and ill.

"But this is what you've got," Severus hissed, grabbing Evan's shoulders and shaking him before dragging him out of the smoldering ruin above which the Dark Mark still floated, luminous against the night sky.

Evan stumbled, and Remus caught his other arm to steady him as they guided him away.

"What did you think it would be?" Severus demanded. "That He would politely ask all the half-bloods and Muggle-born to go away because they weren't welcome to play with us anymore?"

"I don't know…" Evan shook his head. "I thought – I didn't realize—"

"Most people didn't," Remus said gently. "And now it's too late."

"Some of them are reveling in it." Evan shuddered. "Bellatrix… she scares me."

"That just proves you're still sane," Severus muttered as they watched Evan stumble away.

"It's getting worse," Remus whispered, drawing close to Severus. "The Order…"

"The Order is doing its best with limited resources, manpower, and information. They can't save everyone." He cupped Remus' cheek in his palm. " _We_ can't save everyone."

"I know." Remus leaned into the touch, smiling sadly. "But I wish we could."

* * *

**1980:**

_I'm sorry. Please forgive me._

The cryptic note was delivered to both Remus and Severus, but neither of them could figure out why Regulus had sent it.

"Perhaps he means for distancing from us over the past few years," Remus suggested, frowning as he re-read it. "I was never as close to him as you were, but I was surprised when he started drawing away from you too."

"As was I," Severus said, a furrow of concentration on his brow as if he were mulling over the puzzle. "But things were never the same between us after that ‘prank' he pulled. Perhaps he thought I had betrayed him when I didn't stand up for him."

"He seemed stand-offish before that, though." Remus folded the note and tucked it in his pocket. "I don't know. Perhaps he sensed you and I were getting closer, and jealousy got the better of him." His mouth quirked in a one-sided smile. "I always suspected he fancied you."

"Nonsense!" Severus snorted. "At any rate, I'll ask him about it when I see him next."

But in a matter of days, they learned Regulus had gone missing, and Remus had no doubt he was dead.

* * *

**1981:**

It was over. For now.

Severus had fallen into an exhausted slumber in Remus' arms, tear stains still streaking his wan cheeks, and Remus held him and rocked him even after he slipped deeper into sleep.

Remus didn't know exactly what had happened; information was spotty and jumbled at best, and the fragments he could piece together formed a picture he didn't want to see.

Someone had overheard a prophecy and reported it to Voldemort, and now James and Lily were dead, and their child, Harry, was an orphan. The worst part was that the primary suspect was Sirius Black, who had been apprehended and taken to Azkaban after murdering his old friend, Peter Pettigrew, along with several innocent bystanders. Speculation had it that Pettigrew had confronted Black about betraying James and Lily, and Black had murdered him.

That Voldemort was gone as well was of cold comfort to Severus, who had never managed to reconcile with Lily. He was devastated that she had died thinking he was her enemy, and not even the fading of the Mark on their arms could assuage his grief.

Outside, the Wizarding world was in an uproar, celebrating the end of the war, but inside the walls of the house they shared at Spinner's End, Remus held Severus close and listened to the sound of firecrackers and joyous shouting in the streets, and he wondered if they really had cause for celebration when the Dark Mark was still there, faintly visible, just beneath their skin.


End file.
